Remembering Joan Eustis: Administrator, educator, wife, mother, friend...

By Larissa Mulkern

lmulkern@seacoastonline.com

EXETER - Family and friends paid their final respects to longtime educator Joan Eustis at a memorial service Thursday at Exeter Cemetery, located just across the street from the school where she spent most of her professional life.

Eustis, a former teacher and assistant vice principal at Exeter AREA Junior High School, passed away Sunday, July 6, after a yearlong battle with cancer.

She was 64.

Father Mark of St. Michael's Church expressed what many may have been feeling.

"We gather today with heavy and pain-filled hearts, but also with the guilt and emotion and a sense of relief that at least Joan's pain and suffering has to come to an end," he said. "Yet mingled with the relief is the pain of having to say good-bye to someone we love.

"Death is a time for us to confront what it is you believe, when you come to realize the grave is not the end, but a beginning of a beautiful life in a place our Lord has prepared for us ... a place where we will be reunited with our Lord and savior Jesus Christ."

In interviews conducted before and after the ceremony, Joan was described as a woman of great dignity, an excellent administrator and a compassionate and fair assistant principal.

Former Junior High principal Tom Meehan said if he had to choose a word that best described her, it was "class."

During the well-attended services held under a white-and-yellow canopy and with an urn holding her ashes surrounded by flowers, the love of her life, husband Dick Eustis, presented the eulogy.

"I'm not good at this type of thing," he said. "... I'm a softy at heart.

"Today we remember a great lady, my wife, Joan ... you were truly a unique person to share a life with. I only wish it was the beginning, not the end.

"She was the most complete, comprehensive person I've known in my life."

Then, from A to Z, he used the words to describe his wife.

"A, she was admirable, athletic ... B a baker, a banker, she was beautiful to me," he said.

She was computer literate, a cook, courageous, and caring. He got to the "D's." "She was a decorator, a disciplinarian," he said, and everybody laughed at "disciplinarian," because she was when she had to be.

"She was an educator, exciting, friendly, funny and, most important, a family person to the umpteen degree; she was a gardener, generous, the glue and framework of our family; she was a housewife, humorous ... jewelry was a great interest of hers, with her friend, Susie; she was kind," he said.

Jump to the "X's," Eustis said he had to cheat, with "X" as the second letter.

"She was extraordinary, one of a kind ..."

"In the not-too-distant future," Dick said, "I, too, will be making that journey and when I do I'm going to look for her and when I find her I will spend eternity with her.

"Joan, bye for now, but not forever, to me you were, you are, you always will be, the greatest lady, wife, friend, and mother I ever met. Thank you for being you," he said and with that he leaned over and kissed her urn.

The Eustis family has long ties to the school: Dick, was the football coach and physical education teacher; Dick's father, Richard, was a former athletic director and coach for whom the football field is named, according to school sources.

After the services, Meehan said Joan was firm but compassionate.

"She was dignified in every thing she did," he said.

"Loyalty - she gave that to me in abundance. I had brain surgery in 1995 and she took over the school and never missed a beat," he said. "She was a rare, rare gem, superlative in every respect, from A to Z."

Exeter Regional High School board member Roy Morrisette called her a "joy to be around" and a skilled negotiator.

Exeter High Athletic Director Bill Ball was a longtime friend and colleague.

"She had such a profound impact on the community," he said. "How many people can go from outstanding educator to outstanding administrator? She was the head of the teachers union and she earned respect on both sides of the negotiating table.

"And as a friend, you're not going to find a more caring, loyal friend."

She helped Ball in the classroom when he first started teaching.

"I had such respect for her judgment," he said. "She had a great ability to deal with the truly gifted and the truly challenged. She gave her all across the board."

Former assistant principal Mike Latvis worked with Joan for many years.

"She had a fine sense of humor, enjoyed and loved life. She was demanding and had high standards," he said.

Latvis recalled how she kept order in an overcrowded junior high in the years before the cooperative middle school was built in Stratham and the Linden Street facility was jammed.

During those crowded years, the school earned an excellence award.

"That achievement was largely due to her," he said.

Jeff Hillier, a former English teacher and assistant principal at the junior high, complimented Joan's teaching ability.

"She was a very, very effective U.S. history teacher, particular with kids who were not too excited about school," he said. "She had a toughness but fairness and every kid was equal in her class. Kids admired her. She was very much respected."

Eustis started at the Junior High as a social studies and U.S. history teacher in 1969. She taught until accepting the position of acting assistant vice principal of the junior high in 1980, making the job permanent the following year.

She retired with after the 1996-1997 school year.

Joan was born May 28, 1939 in Manchester, the daughter of the late Victor and Ruth (Morse) MacKenzie. She was a graduate of Manchester High School and Keene State College. She is survived by her husband, Dick, a son, Richard Jr., of Exeter, a daughter, Terry Eustis and her husband Martin Stollar of Exeter; three grandchildren; one brother, Douglas Morse of Manchester; and one sister, Cin Marston of Celleo, Ohio. She is predeceased by one brother, Richard Morse.